Posted: March 4, 2014 in Other Stuff.....

I had a rough day today both emotionally and physically. I had another coughing fit. This one way worse than the most recent fits and now my chest and back hurts beyond words. Emotionally… I am really struggling to find that peace I once had with being content. I hate that I have lost that… and to be honest I am not sure where I lost it… but this is just rough living/thinking. I wish there was a pill I could take that would bring back that contentment!! It is a choice and why it is so hard to live that choice amazes me. Isn’t funny how we are designed. Jesus summed it up… “The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.” Wow how my spirit longs for that contentment and peace and joy but my flesh is raging a war in getting there.


You know… I still dream of things I want to do and places I want to go. I am sure that doesn’t help my current situation… but I do. I miss thinking that “one day I will…” However… there is one dream that will come around for me one sweet day… I will go to Heaven. That excites me. People who know my struggle and frame of mind right now would worry because of that statement and my past… I would do the same if I were them as well… but I do dream of the day of no more pain. OH my word… no more pain of any kind. NO more broken hearts. NO more hanging on to an illusive tomorrow. NO more good byes. Peace beyond peace we will ever know here.


I just did a small study on Paradise, Abraham’s Bosom and Hades/hell…. since Carrel died you can’t help but think of this stuff and it isn’t like anyone we know personally comes back a week later and tells us how the whole thing works and what to expect… so I went looking for the information that we do have and Jesus laid it out there perfectly in Luke 16…. man we are FULLY aware of where we are, what we “feel” and see and sense. The rich man was being tormented and Lazarus was “comforted” and since Jesus rose from the dead… nothing has changed in hell/hades… but now, oh Abraham’s Bosom/Paradise is now present with the Lord in the 3rd heaven. Oh my word how great is that!


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